The past two days we have been traveling to the base of one of the mountain ranges that separate Swaziland from South Africa. The terrain is rocky and rough. I have been finding that my faith has been a bit rocky, as well. In the face of such overwhelming physical needs, I find myself feeling small and inadequate. The go-go’s and children at this carepoint have to walk 5 km each way to get water. The kids are dressed in dirty and tattered clothes. Many of the littlest ones are naked from the waist down…no pampers here. They sit in the dirt to eat their dish of maize and beans. There are few spoons; most of them eat by scooping the food up with their fingers. After the meal, they might kick around a partially deflated ball or crush small rocks with larger rocks. The babies crawl along the parched ground, putting who knows what into their small mouths. A few of the children are quite timid around us. Not too many white faces make it to such a remote spot. Today, an older woman hobbled on to the property. She held herself up on some rickety homemade crutches. Her right foot was wrapped in a filthy bandage. She sat down on the ground next to me. We greeted one another and sat in silence for a few moments, watching the children play. “Pray for her”. Through one of the translators, I discovered that her foot was broken and had been burned when she fainted into a fire. She said she was having some problems with her family, and that they weren’t very kind to her. She also told me that she had medicine to take (perhaps for pain…not clear) but that she had to take them with food and often she had no food. Today, she would be able to eat at the carepoint. What about tomorrow? “Just pray for her…I see her…I know what she needs.” There is a military road block just before getting to the carepoint due to the fact that it sits so close to a border. The woman told me that the soldiers had laughed at her when she walked by. The sick pleasure this must have given them makes me cringe. ” Pray for them. They don’t know what they are doing…I have already forgiven them.”
My heart began to beat harder as I asked if I may place my hands on her injured foot. She smiled and agreed. I closed my eyes and began to ask God to heal her foot. I asked, in Jesus’ name, for the infected, rotting flesh to be made clean and new. I asked, in Jesus’ name, for the fractured, splintered bones to be restored. I opened my eyes, wanting to see a perfectly fit and healed limb beneath my warm hands. This was not to be…not today.
Was my faith not strong enough? Was her faith not strong enough? I wanted a miracle…“It is not about you, beloved.”
I looked over at a sleeping baby on a mat close by. “Pray for that one.” I walked over and placed my hands gently on the sleeping child’s back. I just whispered blessing and protection over her; that God would give her hope and a future.
I glanced over across the yard in the shade of a tree where Eric sat ministering to a group of older kids. I see Claire holding a baby on her lap, singing songs that I used to sing when she was a baby on my lap. Jacob is sitting near by, with three little boys surrounding him, talking the way only little boys can. “Pray for all of them. Each and every one.” The Spirit continued to whisper into my heart to pray and to keep praying until each need was met. How LORD? How is that possible? How do you continue to see the needs of these, YOUR children? How do you listen to their cries day after day; night after night? Why don’t you do something? Why don’t your bring justice? Come, Lord Jesus…make everything right. “I AM, beloved…I AM…”
And just like that, an answer to each prayer uttered at the base of this mountain…two little words… I AM.
What a blessing you are, dear Jen! Keep doing GOD’s work, little one, HE IS…….
I love you and miss you!
Karla
Jen,
Wow, Others words or comments seem inadequate at the moment. You are being Christ to them. What a awesome challenge and privilege. Will continue to pray for endurance and strength and Spirit will continue work through you and in you!
Blessings, Duane 🙂
crying at work. needed that. thanks. love you guys.
Jen & Eric:
What a blessing you are to those folks in need. Thanks for raising these special people in prayer. As I was reading “Two Little Words” I heard the train whistle and was reminded of my promise to pray for you each time I heard it. Now I have several new prayer concerns to include in that prayer time. May “I AM” continue to give you the strenght to share his love.
Daryl
Jen & Eric:
What a blessing you are to those folks in need. Thanks for raising these special people in prayer. As I was reading “Two Little Words” I heard the train whistle and was reminded of my promise to pray for you each time I heard it. Now I have several new prayer concerns to include in that prayer time. May “I AM” continue to give you the strenght to share his love.
Daryl
Wow Jen!, words can’t describe what I’m feeling after reading this today. Love ya, Dad
i love you so much mom. brought tears to my eyes 🙂
Blessings to both of you! You are in our prayers each day!
May God provide you with strength and special Grace for each day! Thanks for your updates so often as we pray for your specific needs.
Wow. There are no words Jen. Beautiful and so sad at the same time… Praying for you continually (all the Petersons) that you have the strength and wisdom to carry out each day. Wow.
You cannot meet their needs alone – only the Father, OUR Father can. And you are being His hands and feet! Continue to persevere, continue to love, continue to pray. God will faithfully continue HIS working. He sees and knows and hears.
We love you! Praying for you each day. Love you each so much!
WOW! I needed to hear those 2 words also today. Praying with you!
Praying for you and all those you brought to our attention today. Praying for “I AM” to meet whatever need you might have today. Thank you for being the hands, feet, and heart of Jesus to the people of Swaziland.
My beautiful and amazing sister-
it’s been a long time since tears have run so freely from my eyes. i read this and am filled with such an overwhelming feeling of respect and love and gratitude and so many other things for you and your family (my family, too!) i can only imagine how you feel there–i feel so small and inadequate here. i think about you guys all the time and cannot wait to hear from you again.
Love you all SO MUCH!
Leah
thank you for taking the time to keep up with your blog, jen. it is still so hard for me to believe you guys are so far away! i miss you so much, but it helps to be reminded of the meaningful role you play there.
it was great ‘chatting’ with claire the other day (night for you!). makes me feel close to you. thinking and praying about you often,
beck
Wow!! We can see how you can feel overwhelmed. Just remember God is faithful!!! and we will be faithful to pray. We love you all so much.
Jen, Eric and kids –
Praying for you all. Praying for an abundance of grace to be poured over you and the people of Swaziland. I thank the Lord you are there ministering; and in that ministry you are shedding light onto a scene that most of us would have been unaware of and that many choose to ignore.
God Bless!
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8